This week my brain is overwhelmed with questions as I reflect over my experience here. Only now am I realizing how much I have internalized my new life. I am completely adapted, except for the language. Which continues to be a struggle. However, I am currently writing this is my room, while my "host-cat" is trying to take a nap on my computer. She has clearly gotten used to me too.
Even though I have been here for four months, going on five, I have already spent one month on vacation. And as of Friday, I am done with all "normal courses". How weird. How scary. As I said, my mind is overflowing. Have I used my time well? What if I hadn't been so lazy during that week of vacation? Have I really made progress? Its hard to except that I have had so little time in school. That there are people and things I may never see again, starting in just a few days. Should I have put it more effort? Maybe.
I tell myself that being an exchange student is hard, and that I have seen and experienced so much. I tell myself I have surpassed my own expectations. Yet, I find myself wondering, is it enough? Could have I gone further? Why not a year? And I guess the answer is in the question. The "me" that left my home four months ago thought a month was a long time. That "me" thought a year was too long. That "me" would look at all that I have achieved and experienced in the last four months and say, "OK, that`s good enough. You can relax now." The me I am today, is ready for more.
Stay tuned!
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